Saved by the Nephew

Last week I left you with the anticipation of me seeing Fred again, but…let’s just start at the beginning.

I was so distracted I hardly got any work done during the day on Thursday, as you can probably imagine. It didn’t help when Hannah came back from the city with two new outfits and began asking for advice about which one to wear that night. While she debated between the little black dress and red heels or a flirty pink dress, I couldn’t help but remember how he had said he liked me in bright colors. Well, he told me that when I was wearing a fluorescent green shirt I used as pajamas, so maybe it wasn’t the best example of his tastes, but I suggested the pink dress anyway.

            Then Lucy got home and began parading in her different wardrobe choices, but thankfully with Hannah there she could take over the fashion advice. It almost killed me, trying to imagine what Fred would be attracted to on another girl, but I couldn’t not help them. Hopefully the fact that Hannah and Lucy have each other will make things easier if anything happens between one of them and Fred. Romantic advice would be a whole different beast I don’t think I could conquer.

            Then, I was saved. We had twenty minutes until drinks, but then Marie called me in a panic about my nephew. He had a fever and just before threw up his dinner. I went over there to discover Marie in a fit because she couldn’t leave her son with the teenage babysitter in his condition, and Charlie was too busy at work to pick up his cell phone, meaning he would go with their earlier plan of meeting up at his parents’ house after drinks, in time for dinner. Marie cried about how she never gets a break from taking care of her son, and she just wanted to spend one night with some adults, especially one as successful as Fred, who she just had a feeling might be her brother-in-law someday (and no, she didn’t mean because of me).

            And it was too tempting. To not see Fred? To delay that awkwardness and pain? I volunteered to stay with my nephew. So while Marie and Charlie and Hannah and Lucy met Fred, I gave Little Charlie a bath, some medicine, and we watched The Lion King before putting him to bed. 

            I didn’t see Fred, but over the past few days, everyone can’t stop talking about their opinion of him, which had its own brand of discomfort and pain. Marie keeps on saying how much hotter and richer he is than Henrietta’s violinist. Charlie talks more about how brilliant he seemed, his ingenious ideas and how considerate he was to everyone there at the dinner. Other than Marie’s favoritism as to who she wanted to see Fred date, their comments about him are a few minutes of longing for him more than anything. But Lucy’s yammering about how Fred’s rags-to-riches story shows how dedicated and passionate he is, and Hannah’s commenting on Fred’s good looks as well as his gentlemanly behavior, hurts more than anything else. I’ve always known Fred would be an amazing catch for someone, and part of me is surprised he isn’t married, but I don’t want to watch it happen. But with Lucy and Hannah interested in him, I might see feelings develop, at least on their ends.

            Whether or not I see Fred again (which I likely will), I know I’m going to get my ear talked off about him, which will mean more silenced suffering and just this blog to honestly talk about how it’s killing me to be watching everyone fall in love with him when before I didn’t get a scrap of support to be with him. I was the only one to see how wonderful he was before his big internet success, and I’m going to be at the bottom of this whole mess because I wanted him to have this big internet success. No one will know, because despite it all, my frustration and despair, I can’t make the people I care about unhappy.

After all, there’s a reason Hannah and Lucy talk to me about him, rather than to each other. They both like him, and they know that the other likes him as well. They aren’t petty people, they won’t cat fight over him, but it does make it awkward to talk about with each other. I’m their only option to discuss Fred without making things competitive or hurtful.

            I wonder what they would do if they knew.